A few years ago, I bought an iron from Craigslist. It was the easiest transaction ever. I walked a few blocks to the main street in my neighborhood, met a girl on the corner and gave her $15 in exchange for an iron wrapped in a brown paper bag, then we both went on our way. Must've looked like a drug deal, in retrospect.
Now I was in need of a microwave. "Here's one on Craigslist in Mount Pleasant for $25. Done," I thought. "Easy as pie."
What I didn't count on: it turned out to be a giant, unwieldy 1990s style microwave. The apartment turned out to be at the bottom of a giant hill. The temperature turned out to be 90 degrees, all humidity.
I was half way up the hill before I had to put the microwave down on an electrical box and take a short breather. It was then I realized that of my many bad ideas, this was a particularly bad one.
At first I took 15 steps and then took a break, resting the microwave on a stoop, bike rack or building window sill. Then it was 10 steps. Then it was 8 steps. Then it was 5 steps. The breaks kept getting longer. Sweat loosened my grip on the microwave and made my glasses slip off my nose.
My arms are hurting just typing this out.
It had to look like the definition of a fool's errand. I'm sure I looked quite silly, which is not a new look for me. Of the many people I passed, three offered to help and curiously enough, all of them were women. Two of them were AARP card holders. It was very sweet of all them to offer to help, but I didn't want them to throw their backs out.
"I can do this," I thought when I was two blocks away, two blocks that seemed to stretch on for miles. But with shaky arms, I wondered, could I really do this? For some reason, the thought of abandoning the microwave never even crossed my mind.
Then, deus ex machina, a man getting off the bus volunteered to carry the microwave the remaining two blocks. Probably instantly regretted it. But cheers to you, Good Samaritan! Cheers to Good Samaritans of both genders!
And when I finally got the microwave settled in the kitchen and plugged it in, the dang thing worked. Cheers to Craigslist too, I guess.
